• Kid: Yeah give me a pack of Marlboro Reds.
  • Cashier: Are you 18?
  • Kid: It's okay, they're a metaphor.

the-captains-wife:

dutchster:

worldpeaces:

can we just take a second to realize that there are 14 year olds that weren’t born in the 90’s. just fucking let that sink in.

what the fuck does he want now

image

Thats it that’s the single greatest pun on tumblr

(via ssaalexblake)

aimso:

Apparently how people feel after waking up from naps.

image

How I feel after waking up from naps.

image

(via heyfunniest)

bullied:

party at my house bring food then leave

(via hate)

professorfalconer:

thesylverlining:

elkian:

teen-heat:

why do advertisers sexualize female m&ms

why do advertisers assign gender to m&ms

why do advertisers humanize food products

why is there a bear family who considers the highlight of their day to be wiping their asses

why can no one believe it’s not butter

(via aniallation)

gokuma:

autumnramble:

I want to die and be born again as a full hobbit.

I think hobbit metabolism work differently than human…

(Source: dailystir, via pizza)